racoon grease?

December 03, 2002 / 12:22 am

Oh what a day.

We woke up all excited for our day since we have a car to bring us places and such. We sat on the couch and got good and baked and then Mike went to bring the car around. I excitedly stood outside and watched for him to come around the corner. After a minute or two I decided it was too damn cold to wait outside so I went into the entry way.

A few minutes later Mike came back with a sad expression on his face. I thought the car was gone and almost had a heart attack. Then Mike proceeded to tell me that our locks were frozen.

Our locks were frozen? How did that happen you say? Well....our dumbasses, in a fit of old/new car joy, washed the car and then parked it.

That's right, the coldest fucking night we have had yet in Minnesota and we decide it needs a good hosing with water before retiring for the night.

Sometimes my ignorance shocks me.

So yeah, for three hours today we tried everything that we could think of to rememdy the situation. We tried blowing into the locks to warm it up (hey someone recommended that don't laugh at me!), boiling water, two different kinds of de-icer from the hardware store and NONE of these things worked.

After plenty of sighing and threats of suicide, Mike calls the guy we bought the hooptie from. He says to give the door a good kick and we roll our eyes at the thought. I mean, fuck, we tried the stuff that was designed to fix the problem at hand,right? The idea that just kicking the door like a caveman sounded stupid. But yeah, you guessed it, worked like a charm.

I have raging PMS right now. I just wanna scoul and whine and it's horrible. I was really hungry and decided to eat a (gasp) pizza for dinner, right? I gulped it down and proceeded to burn the shit out of the top of my mouth. It's peeling and everything. Grrrr.

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